Please Do Not Eat The Grass

On my last trip to the drug store, I got a terrible case of the gimmies. 


Perhaps, Spring is the launching season for new candy products (I’ve yet to track the cycle of the candy manufacturers), because there were so many new types of candies that I’d never seen before!  After examining all of the delicious Chocolates and safe-bets lining the shelves, I picked up some Yogurt Dots, Baskin Robbins Very Berry Strawberry Soft Candy, and Edible Easter Grass.  I don’t know what possessed me.


Yogurt Dots:  Normally, I consider the Dot to be a respectable classic.  I fondly remember coveting them in my Halloween bucket.   All I have to say to this is, “what were you thinking Tootsie Roll Industries?”  Why did you do this and release this inferior, and poorly flavored, fruit-snacky version of a timeless candy?  And what a bizarre and disappointing choice of flavors, like Banana (artificial banana flavor: one of the most loathsome flavors), blackberry, and lemon-lime.  


Baskin Robbins Candy:  This is nothing like ice-cream in any way, shape or form.  Lets just preface with that.  The individually wrapped candies were almost the spitting image and flavor of bubble-gum, making them intensely difficult to swallow. My body’s instinct was not to ingest.  In fact, I was so perplexed that I double-checked the box to make sure that I was in fact supposed to consume them.  


Edible Easter Grass, imported from Germany:  First, let me explain myself.   In the case of The Grass, I was not expecting anything very appetizing.  I just found the product odd and was curious.  It looks a bit like flat ropes of dried cotton candy and has a slight flavor resemblance as well.  I’m still not convinced it is actually edible.  For one thing, I looked at the nutritional facts and there is zero sugar content.  What sort of candy is this? The first item on the ingredient list is potato starch. Weird.  For another thing, when held in your mouth, it first feels like you’ve just consumed packing-peanuts and then it begins to melt a bit and becomes uncomfortably slimy.  “Dear Easter Bunny, I would rather you not put this in my basket.  Thank you.” 



Overall, my drug store adventure was a dud.   Still, I’m not dissuaded.  There will be more candy to try and you can be sure I will.  




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2 responses to “Please Do Not Eat The Grass

  1. providentiallife

    1. I get the gimmies in the drug store for candy, and it reminds me of you.
    2. Really? Edible grass? Had I been with you, I would have strongly advised against this. That said, I’m glad someone tried it 😉

  2. kitchendoor

    This cracked me up. My body’s instinct would have been not to ingest, as well.

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