Allow me preface this entire entry with the fact that my partner and I made WHITE petit fours. I therefore abstain from any judgments made about the following confection. Also, the photographs you are about to see contain graphic images and my not be appropriate for younger audiences.
These petit fours are green.
(And these photos mute the color considerably)
Perhaps the new coat of paint (yes, ‘tis more like paint than fondant), gives the petit four new confidence, allowing the once harmless treat to become an edgier and wilder indulgence. “Look at me now,” bellows the petit four in the most bellowing voice a petit four can muster. “I am no longer just a snack for tea! I’m green! I have new places to go and exciting things to see! Look at me! Look at me!” In its box, the green petit four looks up, beaming hopefully at the world,
Sadly, what the little cake doesn’t know is that no one wants a bright green petit four. One might even describe them as “unappetizing.”
A list of things that are green like the petit four and thus, makes them “unappetizing”:
1. Kermit the Frog
2. Slimer (of Ghostbusters)
3. Glow-in-the-dark sticky stars
4. A “Double Dare” contestant
5. Leggings that might have been worn on “Saved by the Bell”
Nothing edible should be designed to be this color. Especially not petit fours. I’ve always imagined petit fours as elegant, lady-like bites of sugariness. Images of pastels, springtime, fancy hats, teatime, and innocuous conversation come to mind. I did not, however, imagine having apprehensions about contracting radiation poisoning.
So, the little, green petit four never reached a customer or restaurant. Instead, students crammed them into dark boxes and ate them in dorm rooms. Perhaps, neon petit four, the world was just not ready for you.