Green Sherbet Glasses and A Tale of Deranged Looking Tchotches

Confession: I have this tendency.  I am drawn to strange and slightly deranged looking tchotches.

Or rather, they are drawn to me.   Regardless, we find each other.  Then, I take pictures of them to snicker at and admire in my spare time.  In fact, you may have been the lucky recipient of an unprompted and unexplained email containing one of these disturbing images.  I like to share my findings with friends.

Here.  Take a look.

Terrified?

Exactly the point.

I usually have a couple questions upon discovering one of these jewels.

1. Why do they exist in the first place?
2. Are they mass-produced in factories someone specializing in maniacal knickknacks?
3. I am the only one in the world seeing these things and finding them odd?

A classic case of this type of curiosity occurred while I was residing in Pennsylvania.  During a leisurely afternoon drive in my minivan, I came across an “Antique Mall.”   Upon seeing its barn-like infrastructure and startlingly crowded parking lot, I knew I’d have to stop and take a look.  It enticed me in the way Tim Burton’s Beetlejuice enticed Winnona Rider.   I took the bait and metaphorically chanted,  “Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice, Beetlejuice.”

Low and behold, I was transported to the Mecca of terrifying trinkets.  People in fanny packs wandered around, admiring magenta kitten figurines and armadillo-shaped cookie jars.  Fully equipped Navy Seal dolls loomed in darkened corners, while H.R. Pufinstuf and Ronald McDonald peeked from the shadows.

What does this have to do with baking you may ask?  What does this have at all to do with the kitchen?  Well, somewhere in the midst of all this twisted amusement, I was lead to my very favorite drinking glasses in all the world.

In actuality, they are Sherbet Glasses.  Not drinking glasses at all, but they remind me of the retro, wide-mouth champagne glasses, also know as “champagne coupes,” or “champagne saucers.”   Yes, I realize these glasses don’t hold the carbonation as effectively as a flute, but I don’t care.    You see them in old, romantic films like, “An Affair to Remember,” where Cary Grant and Deborah Kerr sip upon pink champagne while exchanging meaningful glazes.  In my book, this is enough information to abandon any and all practicality.

The Sherbet/oversized champagne glasses are made of green Depression glass, giving every beverage an exciting radioactive hue.  Yes, I realize wine connoisseurs might cringe when the drupe of even the reddest grape variety appears to have poured with a yellow-green tinge.

Lucky for me, I am not a wine connoisseur.   Plus, the off-putting color of the wine gives homage to the location where the glasses were first discovered…they are a tribute to the crazy world of other peoples’ trash, furnishing each beverage with a unique, “Beetlejuice meets MGM starlet” fascination.

In the end, it makes for a more dynamic drink.  The cups, plates, vessels, troughs, bags and bins from which we consume our food can be equally as exciting as the food itself, providing an experience beyond taste (or at least augmenting it).   The crazy clown puppets and vintage rocking chairs that sat next to the green sherbet glasses impart a history upon each beverage they serve.

Cocktail anyone?